Pat Ritter. Books

[patritter]

'Confessions of an alcoholic' - Page 8:

During the following couple of moments the events of the morning that followed changed Bundy’s life forever. Ada had had enough – ‘enough was enough’ she exploded into a voice loud enough so to awaken the dead saying, ‘I’ve had enough Bundy. You’re a drunk. I didn’t marry a drunk. I don’t know where you are, when you’re not at home. You never let me know where you are. When you got home last night you were so drunk, I told you not to come to bed and sleep on the lounge. I’ve had enough. If you come home drunk tonight the kids and I are leaving!’
Bundy couldn’t understand why Ada was so upset. His mother never spoke to his father that way after he had a night of drinking. Ada was not his mother - she was his wife.
He remembered to when he was a youth growing up, witnessing his own father’s alcohol abuse, pleading with his mother to leave his father, and hearing his mother say, ‘I can’t. I love him. He doesn’t realise what he’s doing. He’ll be alright by morning.’ He wanted so much for his father to stop drinking alcohol.
Bundy suddenly realised, he was modelling his father’s drinking behaviour, and thought it was all right to do what his father did. It was, as if his life had been scripted; and he was playing the same role, his father played many years before.
‘Is my drinking having an effect on our marriage?’

To purchase this book: click here: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/7688.

[patritter]

Page 9:
A feeling of anxiety overcame him, his brain tried to capture the full meaning of what Ada said. He couldn’t imagine life without Ada and the children. The words he said should be embossed into bronze and placed where everyone can see them. These words were so important at that time of their marriage.
‘I PROMISE YOU NOW - I WILL NEVER DRINK ALCOHOL AGAIN.’
Ada had given Bundy an ultimatum. It was now up to him to challenge himself to keep that promise.
Bundy didn’t have breakfast that morning. He showered, dressed, and went off to work. When he walked into the office at his work all his workmates were there. After the usual good mornings to one another Bundy said he had an announcement to make. He said to all his workmates, ‘I’ve promised Ada I will never drink alcohol again.’
In a chorus his workmates said, ‘Thank Christ for that.’
He realised, it was not only Ada who’d had enough of his drinking, it was also his workmates. Herbert said, ‘Does this mean you won’t be coming to the pub with us anymore?’
‘No. I’ll still come, but I’ll be drinking something other than alcohol.’
‘We’re going over to the pub at ten o’clock this morning to have ‘a hair of the dog’, it was a big night last night and I need something to settle me down.’ Herbert said.

[patritter]

'Confessions of an alcoholic' - Page 10:

‘I’ll come over and see Johnny to see what I can drink that hasn’t got alcohol in it.’ Bundy replied. He suddenly realised what he had done. He made a promise not to drink alcohol for the remainder of his life. He was only twenty-eight years old and was determined to succeed. It was a long time for the rest of his life.
Alex, Bundy’s boss to whom he had the utmost respect, finally expressed his thoughts about Bundy’s decision saying, ‘It’s not as though you drink all of the time. You might not drink for a couple of weeks, then bang off you go for the next couple of weeks and make up for lost time.’
‘Yes, Boss.’ He replied in an incredibly quiet voice as if he were being chastised. He hated confrontation. Bundy had the utmost respect toward Alex feeling very embarrassed by his past drinking behaviours.
He was forever frightened of getting into trouble. Throughout his life every time someone raised his or her voice, he felt a sharp pain near his heart making him feel anxious causing his feelings to immediately transform into a defensive mode.
When he drank alcohol, he didn’t have any fear of getting into trouble because he was drunk and didn’t take any notice of what happened. Drinking alcohol gave him Dutch courage.
‘I’ll be trying this time boss; because I promised Ada I would never drink again. She said if it happened again, she leaves me and take the two children with her.’
‘She’s fair dinkum then.’ Alex said.

[patritter]

Confessions of an alcoholic' - Page 11:

‘You bet she is. You should have been there this morning when she was really going off at me. I’ve never seen or heard her do that before.’
‘She’s probably had enough. Women are like that.’ Alex replied, ‘anyway, let’s get over to the pub so I can fix this pain in my guts.’ Alex continued.
Right on ten o’clock Bundy went with his workmates over to the hotel taking up their usual positions in the bar area. ‘I can’t even have ‘a hair of the dog’, Bundy thought.
Many a morning after a big night’s drinking Bundy went to the pub to have a quick drink of beer to ease the pain and suffering, he endured from drinking the night before. It was a quick fix, ‘a hair of the dog’. A saying to mean one drink of alcohol usually eased the pain and suffering to make one feel better. It worked sometimes.
It was thought that ‘a hair of the dog’ would make one feel better. Whether it was psychological or not, no one knew. It did make one feel better, mixing the old stale grog with the new.
He’d often seen people worse off than himself at the pub at that time of the morning. Early one-morning he saw a man who looked the worst for wear standing beside him in the pub. That’s probably the best that fellow will feel for the rest of the day, Bundy thought.
This person placed a tea towel around his neck like a sling and held onto one end with one hand and held the other end of the tea towel with his other hand. He wrapped this hand around a glass filled with alcohol.

[patritter]

'Confessions of an alcoholic' - Page 12:

He steadily pulled the tea towel down with one hand so the hand with the glass moved closer to his lips. Like a sling action. Both hands were shaking but he was careful not to spill any of the drink slowly moving the glass to his lips. He was shaking and trembling but when the alcohol hit his lips, the trembling ceased.
It was as if he was a magician doing a magic act. It must be bad when you need to do that to have a drink, Bundy thought. What’s going to happen to me if I get that bad, he said to himself.
Bundy said to Johnny, who was the owner of the pub, ‘Johnny, I’ve promised my wife, I will never drink alcohol again.’
‘Thank God for that.’ He replied.
I must have been a terrible drunk, Bundy thought even Johnny is pleased I’ve given the booze away.
‘Since I’m not drinking alcohol, I still want to come to the pub. Is there anything non-alcoholic I can drink?’ He asked Johnny.
‘There’s claytons tonic. It came in this morning. It’s non-alcoholic; you mix it with ginger ale.’ He replied.
‘I’ll try it then.’ Bundy replied not certain how this new drink would taste.
Johnny poured a nip of claytons tonic into a glass then topped it with ginger ale. ‘Try that.’ He said handing the glass to Bundy.
‘How much will it be?’ Bundy asked.
‘Ah, about ten cents will do for now, I haven’t worked out the cost yet because it only came in this morning.’ He continued.

[patritter]

'Confessions of an alcoholic' - Page 13:

Bundy placed the glass to his lips and started sipping the claytons tonic and ginger ale, he thought, what a bloody awful drink, it’s like drinking syrup. It’s too sweet. He emptied the glass reluctant to ask for another.
When it was Bundy’s turn to shout the round of drinks, that is, every time a round of drinks was ordered, each person in the group in their turn, paid for the round Alex said, ‘You don’t have to pay for this round, it’s only lolly water you’re drinking. We’ll shout you.’
It was a bit of a joke to everyone except Bundy. They’d already mentioned how pleased they were he’d stopped drinking – now they’re putting rubbish on him about what he’s drinking. I don’t care what they think, he thought, I made a promise and I’ll stick with it. It can’t be THAT BAD not drinking.
At that moment, his mind reflected to a time when he was working with another detective in the city who didn’t drink alcohol. This person, John, drank orange juice. He remembered how John drank a pot of orange juice to every pot of beer drank by the other drinkers.
At the end of each session when others in the group decided they’d had enough, or had run out of money, or most of the people in the group were pissed, John, who drank orange juice all through the session, appeared to be just as pissed as all of the others. He couldn’t have been pissed because he only drank straight orange juice.
It seemed funny at the time. Now it was his turn.
How would the others react to his drinking of a non-alcoholic drink and remembered drinking sessions went all day depending on who you were drinking with, and how much money you had at the time.

[patritter]

'Confessions of an alcoholic Page 14:

He worked out the cost of his drinking alcohol. Pots of beer in those days were around fifty cents a pot. Sometimes, he drank from five o’clock in the afternoon constantly until ten o’clock that night. It was not only the cost of buying the beer, but also lending money to other drinkers with the promises of ‘I’ll pay you back on payday mate.’ Payday never arrived.
His wages were one hundred and fifty dollars a week. He estimated with the amount of money he spent on alcohol plus giving away money to his drinking mates, he was wasting about seventy dollars a week, which amounted to half of his total wage.
Who was suffering? It certainly wasn’t Bundy.
That day Bundy discovered what it was like for him to make instant changes to his life. Instead of his normal practice of going to the pub after work he went home. What was he going to expect from Ada when he arrived home? Would she greet him with open arms and save him from keeping his promise? All these uncertainties were floating through his brain.
He didn’t do much work.
Bidding farewell to his workmates that afternoon, they too incidentally felt some guilt, going home after work to their wives and families instead of their usual visit to the hotel.
On his journey home he didn’t even know what he was going to expect when he got home.